i was tired and needing a nap when i got home yesterday, but mom wanted me to go to the store.  she was weepy and slumped into her corner.  she added cake and cigarettes to the list before i left.

it had been a while since i'd gone to the store for a big list late at night. after i checked out, the lady with curly hair, who's always there late, stopped me and said "i just wanted to tell you that you're perfect at doing the u-scan with a full cart. everyone else needs me to help them half a dozen times. but you know exactly what to do." i giggled and smiled and said i'd had a lot of practice. i thanked her for noticing. it kind of made my night.

when i got home, i grabbed an armful of groceries and headed toward the house. i saw this flash of white and i stopped. then sadie came running by and up onto the porch in front of me. i grumbled at her and put down the groceries to let her in. when i walked in the door, my mom said in a dizzy voice,
"oh....i forgot she was out there."
"how did she get out?"
"... ... i let her."
"what?"
"well i didn't want to bother anyone..."

i hate it when my mom gets like this.

i know it's april. i noticed that almost all of the pictures of my dad i had put up on the fridge a few months ago were sitting in a pile on the counter.

today on the trip to lowes she was pretty down still. sulky and sighing all the time. i dunno. i shouldn't be so annoyed by it. but i am.